Today

Today, I made it to church for the 2nd week in a row.  I haven't done that in so long it's embarrassing.  I even went without Kent.  That is huge for me.  And I know how sad that is.  I am blessed to have a good friend and mother-in-law to help me out....seriously grateful.  I am hopeful that soon, when I leave church I will feel spiritually fed.  I don't know how to put it exactly, I don't want to come across judgmental, or I don't know, I just struggle sometimes.  Kent told me I need to read a talk about learning from an imperfect teacher or something like that.  For now I have decided to just focus on the obedience aspect of it all.  I am supposed to go to church, I am supposed to take my children to church, and I will.  I will be obedient.

Now that I have been there 2 weeks in a row I have officially worn all of the church clothes I have.  Looks like I need to do a little shopping this week.  I think I am excited about that.  I always am until I realize what size I have to buy.  And the way I think I look in the fun house mirrors they put in dressing rooms.  You would think stores would catch on, line your rooms with slenderizing mirrors and they would sell clothes faster than McDonalds sells fries.  Speaking of, fries sound killer right now....which you know, will totally help me fit into my perfect size....

Today after church, we went over to my moms.  Everybody was there, and despite the chaos, it was fun.  We haven't all been over there at the same time in forever.  I talk to Amy and Lisa a lot but I sometimes go a long time without talking to my brother.  I forget sometimes how much I like hanging out with him.

On the way home, I heard Colton say "Chicken Butt".  Then a second later, "Guess what chicken butt"  Aubrey was less than enthused, but it made me smile.  It is like a right of passage, one of those things all kids learn at school.  He said Zayne taught it to him.  My best friend all through grade school ALWAYS said that.  But of course, I had to remind him that we don't say butt, so he said 'chicken bum' and I had to tell him it just isn't funny that way...which inevitably means "Guess what chicken butt" will be saved for those moments I am not around.  And honestly, that is totally fine by me.

I am proud of myself these last few weeks.  I have been working hard to be a real mom and wife...aka, I get up in the morning and shower, cook dinner, do laundry, run the dishwasher everyday, have the whole downstairs cleaned up before bed, you know June Cleaver like.  And even though at the end of those 2 weeks I ended up crying on a little pink stool in the kitchen from exhaustion and hormones I'd like to think, it was totally worth it.  Kent helped cheer me up by ordering a bunch of food from Pizza Hut and watching Millionaire Matchmaker with me.  I am determined to keep going with my new schedule, and hope I will learn to love making dinner.  I really hate making dinner.  I am horrible at it.  Or maybe my kids will grow up looking forward to the nights we eat out or at a grandma's house...So, here is to another week of bedtimes, bath times, and laundry!