I am being invaded by fruit flies.  I think I will quite literally lose my mind if they don't go away.  Stupid bananas.  I had no idea when I picked them up to throw them away I was opening the gates of hell.

Today was kind of amazing.  I wasn't sick and I wasn't tired, afternoon tired doesn't count.  I took a shower, put on clean sweats, and actually wore a little make-up today.  I didn't even recognize the face staring back from the mirror...but with all good things of late, there is a catch.  In the form of a constant headache.  The bottle of  meds that Danielle so generously shared, says MAY CAUSE HEADACHES...and it did not disappoint.  For today, I was like, hands down, I'll take it....but how will I feel a few days in...not so sure....but I'm hopeful...

The funny thing is, I spend my time praying and wishing to feel better, and as soon as I do, I have to make a conscious effort to not worry and stress.  When I had my miscarriage, one day I just started feeling better, and a few days later I saw the tiniest bit of blood...and then my whole everything was turned upside down...the doctor said it had been at least a few days...I feel like everything I'm hoping for can be gone in a second, and I won't even know it...so the sickness, and the medicine can kinda feel bitter sweet at times...and when I lost that baby, I was about 11 weeks, now I'm only 7, and trying my best to be optimistic.  I wish I could channel some of Kent's ability to not think about it, he's way better at not worrying about things he has no control over and that aren't a problem yet...

My due date is May 30th.  With c-sections, they usually deliver about a week early...which means I'll be like 3 weeks post baby heading to the beach!  I think my parents are leery of my ability, but I am dead set on proving my superman abilities...I will be there, one way or another...

So a fun thing happened at dinner tonight.  Aubrey totally thought she could throw away her taco and then head straight to the pantry for a pop-tart.  She's cute, if nothing else.  Needless to say, it didn't end well for her...

Amy, Lisa, and I ate lunch at Five Guys today.  I literally ate my weight in french fries.  And it felt so good to eat something that actually tasted good.  I was stuffing my face because I wanted to be, and not because I had to...the small things in life...

I feel like my house smells weird...I can't put my finger on it, but it's driving me nuts...

Tonight after dinner I drove Payson home, it was completely dark by like 6:45.  So annoying to have such short days...anyway, I just want to say to the black boy riding his skateboard in the street in the complete dark, you are super lucky you were riding next to the blonde haired white boy on the bike....is that so mean?  I don't mean it to be at all, but I literally could not see him...and the other kid was so white he was practically reflective...

Ok, I'm done, I think my shows are finally on.  Parenthood, I'm coming!!

Picture...

'mom!  loot what I made!'...these blocks are always everywhere.  She has recently started sliding them across the tile floor.  It's the loudest, most horrible noise ever...

I am forcing myself to blog tonight, no promises of quality of content, but I have to get back in the swing of things...

Right now my life consists of peeing, eating, sleeping, and laying on one piece of furniture or another.  Pregnancy rocks.  It is the best of times and the worst of times....

No joke, I had no idea I could sleep this much.  Or feel this terrible so many days in a row...or be required to eat so much.  Eating has been the one constant joy in my life, and I feel totally robbed.
Eating feels like such a tortured chore...

But on to brighter news, the kids were ecstatic when we told them.  Addy asks like every ten minutes when the baby is coming out.  The best was when I actually stood up the other day and she was all "look mom, the baby is dwowing!  Your stomach is bigger!"  Thanks a heap, I don't thing the grain of rice sized baby did that...

The news with Colton is....he had a fundraiser for basketball and him and Kent managed to sell 104 items!  If that doesn't get my kid more playing time, I might run his coach over in the parking lot.  He brought his progress report home and he is meeting expectations in everything!  I'm always super proud of him in school.   He is hoping for a boy, but watching him with his little cousins, I know he'll be an awesome big brother to this baby no matter what...

Aubrey has to get reading glasses, which is totally what she was hoping for.  Funny how it's such a cool thing now...she loved all the thicker frame glasses, and of course looked cute in every single pair.  Her progress report showed she needs some help in reading and writing, but I'm hoping her glasses will make a big difference.  When I would be reading with her, it was like I could tell her eyes were getting tired...the longer we read, the closer the book gets to her face and the more words she says wrong...she's sassy as ever, and actually had to get soap in her mouth the other day.  That was fun.  Why does she challenge me so??

Colton and Aubrey were both asked to unload the dishwasher and I even offered to pay them to load it.  But within a 5 minute period they had been fighting and tattling on each other so much, I sent them to their rooms and did it all myself.  I made them stay in there for about 2 hours.  I am literally at my wits end with them.  They are mean and bossy and terrible to each other all the time!! It's all I can do to get them off to school in the morning without ruining the whole day.

Addy is awesome as always.  Yesterday we were laying on the couch together, me on my side, her kinda down by my legs with her head on my bum.  I shifted my weight and she said "mom, don't move!  I need something big and fluffy to lay on"...she is loving preschool and is always talking about all the rules...I posted this on Miss Molly's facebook page the other day...Addy said "miss Molly's rules are no scribbling, no painting on people's hands, and no touching your poop. And her last rule is no coloring on the table"...never a dull moment with that one.  Her name suggestions for the baby have been Brownie, Golden Diamond, and I forget the other one right now...

Ok, this is as much as I can muster tonight...I almost forgot, I need to give a huge shout out to Linda for bringing us dinner tonight, and Danielle, for bringing me cookies AND medicine!!!  I felt so spoiled!

Fingers crossed the medicine will cure my motion sickness without making me a tired mess...

Picture...

the adorable fighting thorn in my side....

and they're trusty sidekick....

I so don't feel like blogging, but I'm afraid if I wait much longer, I'll stop all together. 

Tonight I had no dinner planned so I baked a cake instead.  Then I microwaved Colton bagel bites, made the girls top ramen and made myself an over cooked, dry chicken breast.  Chicken is literally my kryptonite.  I hate making it with all my heart...and then we ate cake.  And my chicken jerky dinner was a thing of the past...it totally hit the spot...twice...

I had to call my mom tonight to talk me through a mothering melt down.  I am the queen of threats, and tonight after one too many chances, I sent the girls to bed early for not cleaning up.  Aubrey had actually taken care of a lot of it, but then she started messing around, and at least 2 times I told her to get out of the kitchen and finish up...and when she didn't take me serious, I finally called it quits.  It all would have been fine, but then I heard her yelling at Addy how it was all her fault, and she never does anything, and on and on...so then I started yelling, obviously.  And then I started threatening again, this time spankings with a spoon if I heard from them at all....and wouldn't you know, a few minutes later Aubrey comes out to tell on Addy.  And I lost it.  I yelled.  I chased her to her room.  Yelled some more.  Cue stomach ache and guilt.  And Aubrey crying.  So I resisted the urge to hug her and crawl in bed with her and I called my mom.  Was I mean for leaving her there like that?  I hate sending them to bed that way.  I hate the feeling after yelling at them, but sometimes it seems like the only way to get them to listen.  But if I hugged her, and laid with her, wouldn't I just be feeding in to her...ugh!!  I felt better by the end of the conversation, and I even have a plan, a plan that does not involve yelling...I was grateful for the advice...but even now that she's sleeping, I want to go curl up next to her...because when she's sleeping she can't back talk...and that's my favorite...I love her with my whole heart...and I'm always afraid she won't know...

I finally washed all my sweats, so I could actually wear them for my clothes today.  I wish sweats were acceptable to wear everywhere, everyday.  It's a wonder I ever  wear jeans...have you seen those pajama jeans at Walmart?  Who comes up with this stuff?

A few of my favorite Addy moments...

Kent told Addy to clean up, and then I told her, and then he told her again and left the room.  Finally I got up and told her I would help her so it would actually get done.  She always starts, but then ends up playing with the things she meant to clean up...anyway, she says to me "mom, how about you help me pit up but I tell dad I did it."  Hard to find fault in a good idea...

Last night I was reading with Aubrey, and Colton and I were helping her with the words she didn't know.  Addy comes over and starts sing songing 'Aubwey tan't wead, Aubwey tan't wead'  I told her to stop, and she proceeds to whisper the same thing...I finally have to tap her in the mouth to get her to stop.  It was so mean!!  And out of no where!  Why are my kids so mean to each other?!

My parents came and babysat for me the other night, and when I got home they were all watching Leave it to Beaver.  Ward gets kinda fresh with June!  And I forgot how cute the Beave was...

I had a chance to talk with Nat for a few minutes today...I really miss them...I hope we talk tomorrow, we didn't end up having much time today...

Colton was super proud to show me he got a 4 on his reading log.  He said that means above average.  He has to log how much time we read, and then everyday there is question he has to answer.  I read through some of them, and I'm impressed by how thorough he is with his answers..he really is a smart kid...

I swear the weather went from hot to freezing. 

I want some new boots.

Pictures....

there was something so hilarious about this little tiny body in these huge scary masks...made my day..

licking the bowl, really is the very best part...

The girls were so proud of their tea party this afternoon...

I set a goal for myself today.  I would not get back in my bed.  For the whole day.  And I actually accomplished my goal...I was however, back in sweats by 3:30...I didn't want to get too carried away...and maybe my love for food and sweets is making my jeans less appealing...

I'm trying so hard to fight my inner beast, the one that says I hate everything and the entire world is annoying...I have brief moments of reprieve, a battle won, but I fear I am losing the war...

I was asking the kids what they want for Christmas...tablets, iPods, and phones were their answers.  I couldn't even sell the girls on a doll house.  Addison brought up Santa, and I reminded her that she needed to be good because Santa knows when kids are naughty...her response was so very her..."do you want to know why I keep being naughty?  Tause my body keeps doing it and I tan't stop!" then she whimpered, and whined, and fake cried and fell to the couch...

I made spaghetti tonight.  And it was delish.  Steve and Lisa came by, and they ate some, Josh stopped by, and he had some too, my parents were here...and it was so nice having everyone over for a bit, feeding them some good food...

I totally forgot to blog about my little birthday trip with Denice, Michelle, and Vik.  Last Friday we headed to Prosser for some shopping and lunch.  I really had the best time.  Denice got me a super cute sweater, and I got some antiques and some cookies.  The lady at the sweater store tried selling me some leggings for $37!  Can you imagine, $37 for glorified footless tights...we stopped at a super cute shop in Richland, and I picked some up for $9.  I'm no mathematician, but...oh my gosh, I'm too tired from all the stuff I got done because I didn't lay in my bed today, I can't even be witty and finish that statement...I might set my goals lower tomorrow...

Why can't I love to exercise...

I can't wait to be reunited with my bed...

Pictures...

this was me, about two minutes after Denice told them it was my birthday...I'm not sure why I look so cross eyed...

the end of a fun day....Thank you so much Denice!!

This is my newly painted yellow door...I love the color...

I am so premenstrual, it's like I have mood swing whiplash.  My poor, poor family...

Church was good today, it's a miracle I even made it with the hate in my heart this morning...

After church Addy said before I was even all the way in the car "mom, you didn't ask me about my class"  She was pretty excited to tell me about the book she made and all the things she learned about food, and cows, and pigs, and chickens, but not ducks...they didn't talk about ducks...Aubs came home with a cool little baptismal font she made in class...she was pretty excited about it...

After church I went straight to my sweats, put them on, and made the two step trek to my bed.  And I pretty much stayed there until about 5:00pm...Colton came in to bring me some cheese and crackers and started an interesting conversation with me...he told me he had noticed this dog, that had a sack thing right by his private.  I told him it was the dogs balls.  He kinda laughed and thought for a second and said, "well Jett doesn't have any"  I told him it was because Jett was fixed.  Obviously the next question was 'what does that mean?'  I said, "Well, you know how it takes a boy and a girl dog to make puppies?"  He nodded..."well, the stuff the boy needs to help make the puppy are inside his balls, so they cut them off, that way he can't make puppies"  Needless to say, him and Aubrey were both sicked out by the end of the conversation...Aubrey went out to the kitchen and told Kent we were talking about dog balls...never a dull moment...

A little later, still in my bed, Addy comes in and sees the crackers..

Addy: Oh mom, I want some cheese and twattahs
Me: There isn't any more cheese in here, you have to go ask dad, and he might say no because it's almost dinner time...just ask him if you can please have one little square cheese..
Addy(out in the kitchen): dad, mom wants a cheese
Kent: well, then tell mom to come get one
Addy: mom has a headache and she said she tan't det up

She didn't skip a beat.  Those lies slid right off her tongue, no hesitation...heaven help us...the funny thing with stuff like that is, I'm torn between being worried about her being such a good liar, and being proud of her for being so quick on her feet...

Tonight Kent invited Taryn and Vik and his dad over for the football game.  It was super fun hanging out and eating.  I ran to Josh and Sara's to borrow some eggs to make cupcakes...Aubrey stayed there, and in the ten minutes I was gone, a huge storm was brewing.  I got out of the car back at my house, and this huge, crazy, brown cloud was across the park in Kennewick.  I told everyone to come out and look, and as we were all standing there thinking holy crap, you could literally see the visibiltiy diminishing...we ran inside just as the wind, and dust, and rain hit...it was full on crazy, to watch it all happen...and the thunder and lightning lasted for forever...

A little while later I went to pick Aubrey up, and Danielle and Dennis were there.  Emery yelled "Chaycher!" when she saw me...after a few minutes I headed home and was struck with such a love for the blessing of family in my life.  I had one set of family at my house, just hanging out, and I just left my cousins house, who I grew up with, and his sister, and their kids, and I was thinking about how close we all live to each other...I never would have guessed in a million years Josh and I would end up living in the same neighborhood, just a few blocks apart...and that I would be going to his house to borrow eggs, and we would have daughters the same age, at the same school, and Danielle would live right here, and I love Emery like she is my niece...I was feeling full of gratitude for my family, and how very blessed I am...

In Addy's Red Riding Hood book, the one we have read a million times, it mostly says 'the wolf said...' and 'Red Riding Hood said', but there is this one part that says something about the door being 'open wide, Red Riding hood, don't go inside!' and every single time I read that part she asks "mom, who said that?" I always tell her we did, but she never seems satisfied with that answer...but I'm not sure how to explain what a narrator is...

BH & G Baby Book

Intercourse

Medical authorities usually advise that couples abstain from intercourse during the second and third months of pregnancy at the time when the wife usually has her period, for there's a greater tendency to miscarry then.  Intercourse shouldn't be indulged in at all during the last two or three months of pregnancy.  At other times it's quite alright in moderation...  

-too bad one of the inconsistencies this book would have with a book from 2013,would be referring to the pregnant women as 'wife'

Picture...

We spent our Friday night watching Mrs. Doubtfire, with Kent stripping the door in the kitchen...

 

This was from the storm tonight...about 5 minutes after I took this, we were in the middle of it.  It was crazy how it sucked up all the light...

Why is being tired like some permanent state of being for me?  I did my biggest loser work out today and then danced my arse off to Run the World by Beyonce...and hot damn, my back is killing me...might have to put that booty poppin' on hold for a bit...why am I so atrophied?

I hung out at Denice's pool today with Danielle, Anna, Amy, and Lisa...it's amazing how less crazy it is with only a couple of younger kids.  Denice served us diet coke and watermelon, and then we got my mom to bring us pizza...which in Karen language translates to pizza, soda, and cookies...the kids swam, and colored with chalk, ate...it was a super nice day.  At one point I found Addy and Conley upstairs watching cartoons with Denice while all the other kids played...and then literally the second I had everything cleaned up and hosed off, everyone had just left, Addy and Conley came down in their suits again.  It was a total 'are you kidding me right now' moment.  But I channeled my YOLO and let 'em swim again.  Denice came out and we visited for awhile, then we went inside and visited some more...and I didn't even get home until about 5:00...

Today on the car ride home Addy was trying to show me the book she made at school..."look mom!" Me, turning around, like a lane check look, "yeah, cute!"  Addy-"and mom, look at this, we drawed it all by ahselves" Me- "cool, I'm just gonna look when we get home, cause it's not safe for me to look when I'm driving" Addy- "otay, but you just did"  Touche my friend, touche...

I love evenings when Aub's little friend Mkayla comes over and they run back and forth between houses playing, and eating dinner at eahother's houses...even when Aubrey tells them she doesn't like the kind of noodles they have and their mom makes her a corn dog, and Bobby, Mkayla's older brother walks home with us to see Addy's new haircut...they are great kids, and it makes me feel like Aubs gets to have a bit of what a childhood should be...until it's dark at like 4:30 and we are stuck inside...I hate when the days get short.

Tonight Aubrey asked Addy if she could have some of her candy, Addy said "No, betuz yuh not beautiful"  Not wearing the right jammies can have some serious repercussions...

Reading with Aubs tonight was not working out so well.  I ended up asking if she just wanted me to read, she said replied with an expressive Yes!  I tried my best to have her follow along, and we had a fun little chat about e's making the letters say their name when only one letter is in between them... the funnest part of all the time spent reading was looking for more words with e's all over the page.

I ended up reading 2 chapters to Colton because our book is really getting good...and maybe a little bit because Aubs was brushing my hair and rubbing lotion on my feet...it really was a win win...

Colton keeps coming home with all these multiplication work sheets, and every so often he'll ask me for an answer, I say 'I don't know' and he gets all frustrated, tells me some reason why it's ok if I just tell him the answer, and I have to tell him, no, it's not that I don't want to tell you, I really don't know, as in I have no idea what 6x7 is anymore...guess it's not just my muscles that have atrophied...

Mallary-  I want you to know how much I love reading your blog.  I love it with my whole heart, all the way to the Burg and back...like it's my souls frozen yogurt...your stupid, I hate you...and that means a lot, because I say that about everyone I'm jealous of...dang brilliant blogger...

I'm too tired for a baby book quote...

Picture...

When I got home tonight, I found Colton doing this...first time ever...I watched as Kent made him go back and forth in the same spot at least three times until he got all the grass he missed.  I thought to myself, either he's gonna hate this, or be a really good mower by the end...and he's already asking if he can get paid to do it..apparently he's confident in his work...

and yes, my yard really is that ghetto...I hate it...

So this happened today...note to self, Annie Sloan is a skank.  If paint directions ever tell you to turn the can upside down and then shake, it's because Satan himself wrote the directions.  It. Was. Everywhere.  All over my jeans, the floor, the chair, my rug...and all I kept thinking was "that's $40 in paint all over my floor.  $40!!"So i scooped up as much as could, rinsed the crap out of my jeans, and scrubbed the floor...only signs left of it is the super white grout lines on the tile, an extreme contrast to the color of dirt it is everywhere else...

Miss Congeniality is on tv tonight, still one of the best movies ever...April 25th, because it's not to hot and it's not to cold, all you need is a light jacket...

Today after Addy was eating her swanich, I found her with the IPad of course, laying on Otis's bed with him...I really do find her in some of the oddest places...she really does love her dog...at The Bookworm the other day I saw a book called Goodnight IPad, it was a play on Goodnight Moon, but it was all about our electronic gadgets.  I think I'm putting it on her Christmas list..

Tonight at dinner it was just Colton and I in the kitchen.  I was asking him about school, what they did today.  He told me he had Science and that the sun is going to explode some day and we will all freeze to death.  I told him that science is really cool, but sometimes science and religion don't believe the same things.  He responded, "what's religion?", so I explained what religion is and talked to him about how I'm sure scientifically, the sun could explode, but that I believed Jesus would come again before it did...way before the sun explodes.  We talked a little about the millennium, and Satan being bound for a thousand years...he asked if he was ever bound before, he mentioned he really only has one Mormon friend, named Marshall.  I told him how it's good to have all kinds of friends, and that the most important thing is to always treat people kindly, and to stick up for kids being picked on.  And then I was like, wait a sec, Payson is your friend!  And he gave me the ole, 'yeah but  he doesn't count' look...guess Payson's been around long enough he's like counting family...I asked him if he knew what is was to be gay, he said no, but he hears kids say stuff like, 'that's gay', and then assured me that none of his friends ever say it...that made me smile, he is good at picking friends...and making friends...I asked him if he had ever heard anything about sex, and he made a face and said no...then I asked him if he would want Kent and I to talked to him about any of that stuff and he gave me a no, real quick!  If only it were that easy...if only, I could be like, 'ok, cool. some other time then..' We had a super good conversation, and I loved having even a little bit of one on one with him, just sitting at the counter talking and eating, no distractions...I love that kid with my whole heart.

There was a routine on So You Think You Can Dance tonight about 2 brothers, and one is struggling...it made me think of our talk, and how innocent Colton is now at this very moment, and how it makes my heart hurt to think of the challenges that will be thrown at him...the dancer's movements made me think of a boy that might be into drugs, or someone that struggles with any kind of addiction, and can't seem to get his head above water...it totally scared me for a minute...the future can feel so uncertain and overwhelming sometimes.  I hope I can teach my kids to love the gospel. 

It made me want to go crawl in bed with my kids and hug them tight...tell them I love them, and Heavenly Father loves them, and knows them...

But of course, I sat there...it was the finale!  I had to see who was going to win...but I have a new resolve to tell them as much as I can...to be the kind of mom that will leave my kids with an absolute certainty that I love them with my whole heart...

In less life reflective moments of the show, like all the hip hop routines that had me grinning from ear to ear, I sat dumbfounded at the talent of some people...I feel like my talents are like the seed that wouldn't take.  In my lesson a few weeks ago I mentioned having cousins that must have hit every branch in the talent tree, where I just fell straight to the ground...me and my branchless tree...good thing I'm not afraid to ask them to do stuff for me...like 'Danielle, can you make me this', and 'Mallary, give me a price for fabric, I want some gingerbread cupcakes and a quilt, stat'...and 'all of you come sing to me'...

I made Aubrey her eye appointment today.  She can't get in until Oct 2...I asked her if she wants reading glasses and she said yes!  Glasses are so much cooler now...I just hope we can figure something out and we can get her reading level up...I was quizzing her on her spelling words tonight, and she could spell every word but the ones with u's.  She could spell came and make, but she couldn't spell rug or slug...I feel like there is a missing piece to her reading, and I am determined to find out what it is...if we don't she'll end up some young pretty blonde pushing her boyfriend in his wheelchair saying prenups are a waste of paper...just kidding, she's smart!  I get my sarcasm from my mom, it's a good way to handle stress...and you always make fun of the ones you love, that's what true love is...that's why we laugh so hard when they fall or get hurt... 

Lately I've been feeling like a square peg in a round hole with my calling...I'm trying to be positive, but...uh, that takes so much energy, and I am perpetually tired....like being tired is just my natural state of being...

I want some chocolate...the kind that makes you skinny and your skin clear up...ugh, why don't they sell anything I want....

BH & G Baby Book

Rest Lots if Nauseated

Rest is quite as important as diet.  Diet does little good unless you go to bed at 8 or 9 o' clock-never later-every night, and you should rest some during the morning and afternoon.  Likely you will be able to do regular house work, but outside activities should be curtailed.  If guests come in the evening, excuse yourself when you are ready to go to bed, otherwise the morning after may be very painful.

As every nausea victim knows, the unpleasantness leaves as if by magic when the three months are up, altho it may recur temporarily if there's too long an interval between meals, or if you become too tired.


You may start taking fish-liver oil, the amount to be determined by your doctor, when you get over the nausea.

During a period of nausea, intercourse should be omitted. (Shayla, that might blow your 'written by a man' theory out of the water!)

Picture....

one of the nights Kevin and Nat were here, me, Nat, and Steph took the kids on a walk...it was a super nice night, the walk was relaxing...it was all good, until the walk back home when the killer gnats starting attacking us all...for some reason, they loved Steph the best...and she was hysterical to watch...and seriously, how cute are those kid?

I wish I did half of the nice things I thought about doing.  Addy made up this game called Wishing Tree...she tells everyone when it's their turn to go, and everyone just makes a wish...sometimes if you make your wish out of turn she says you're out of the game...every time I type I wish phone texting shortcuts worked on the computer too...

I did my biggest loser video again today.  And I felt like the biggest loser.  It is so depressing to gain back weight you once worked so hard to lose...it makes me want to be a hermit...I think my constant mental comparison to other people is getting out of hand...it's almost all consuming.  Cue the loser card again.

I tried studying spiritual stuff again this morning...I'm hoping that adding some exercise and spiritual reflection will help improve my self loathing...and mostly, I hope to be in tune with the spirit for my family and the people I serve in my ward, and whom ever the Lord would want me to help.  Righteous desire...always a good place to start...

I miss my far away family...every single one of them...especially the ones who read my blog...just kidding!  I miss all of you, in Idaho and Wisconsin...

I'm super excited about Kent painting my heinous front door this week...it's still gonna look like total crap, but at least it won't be two toned crap.  And I'm really hoping I can add a human size wreath or letter, and then put some cute flowers out there so your eyes basically graze over the actual door...just take in the color and all the surrounding cuteness...here's hoping anyway...if anyone who reads this actually sees the door, please, I beg of you, just lie to me and say it looks great...

The other night I was lighting a smelly candle and Addison walked in the room and said "mom, are you dunna sing Happy Buthday to yuhself?"

Today Addy and I bought a Red Riding Hood book, one of her favorite stories.  I glanced at the first page, it was cute, not too many words, and it even rhymed.  Sold.  We  came home and read it right away...and when we got to the part where the wolf ATE the grandma, and then ATE Red Riding Hood, I thought what in the world did I just buy?  Then the woodsman finally came and in his picture he had a sword on his belt and Addy pointed at it and said "mom, he's supposed to have an ax, not a sword.  Maybe we shouldn't buy this one"  The woodsman proceeds to slice the wolf's stomach open and Red and her Grandma jump out.  Then they fill his belly with stones and sew him up.  Then when the wolf wakes up, he tries to run away, but he falls down and dies. Interesting version, and oddly, I kind of really like the book...Addy's biggest concern was not being able to see when they cut the wolfs stomach open...

Last week Aubs and I were walking Lydia home, and she declared her love for a second boy in her class.  She still loves Eli, but now she loves Johnny too...she just isn't sure which one to date!!  Are you kidding me right now?! I almost died when she told me that part...I told her not to worry about it because she's not allowed to date until she's 16.  She guffawed at my response.  Good grief Charlie Brown...

BH & G Baby Book

You Need Fresh Air

The old theory that the expectant mother must eat twice as much as usual has been exploded.  But it's coming to be understood more and more that the expectant mother must breath for two.  Hence it's very essential that you have plenty of pure air.  You should be outdoors in the daytime all you can-in summer, cooking, eating, and sleeping out if possible; in winter, getting out for walks at least.  The rooms in which you spend anytime during the day must be well ventilated, as your bedroom must be at night.

Close and crowded places where the air is stagnant are unwholesome for you and your baby.  Besides keeping your home well ventilated, stay out of public places where the air is likely to be bad.

*this section is right before the section telling you it's ok to smoke in moderation*

I think my favorite part is when it suggests sleeping outside in the summer if possible...

Pictures....

this is the only picture I've really taken of her new haircut...it's stacked in the back, and every time she walks by me, I still just keep staring at it...it's really cute, it's just so different.  But most importantly, she didn't cut too much of the front, so I don't think she realizes how short it is...and she likes it...

this is a shot of some of the damage...it was cut in so many places...and I really was freaking out...

I couldn't find the iPad the other day...those narcissistic ponies were watching their own show on netflix in the castle in my family room...I think Addy would have been perfectly content being an only child..

This middle child of mine asked why Colton and Addy hate her in the car tonight...breaks my heart... I'm going to make her an eye appointment tomorrow...she's been behind reading level a few times, and after watching her hold the book with a larger font so close to her face tonight, I think it's about time we had her eyes checked... 

Amy and I met up at the mall today...these two are hilarious together...at least when it's just the two of them on neutral territory...Aubs asked me the other day why Addy always gets to go do all the fun stuff with me when they are at school...this might be the stuff she's talking about...

 

So, this morning when I woke up I vowed to myself I would stay awake and be productive.  At first the whole productive idea just wouldn't take seed so I played skip bo on my phone for probably over an hour.  But there was this nagging thought that just kept coming back to me from the other day...I was out on a visit with my fellow counselor and as she was sharing a spiritual message, she started by saying '...when I was studying this morning...' and I thought to myself, of course she was...then I thought what a great idea...maybe you should try it...so I turned off my game and searched the church website, and stumbled upon the visiting teaching message for the month.  It was all about being self-reliant, but the sentence that really took hold was about not being idle...which is pretty much my whole existence.  So, I pulled up my big girl panties and got to work on the gross mess that one might call 'the laundry room'.  It was so full of crap and garbage...but I kept working, and 2 huge garbage bags later, and a couple trips to the garage and it doesn't look too bad....in fact, it looks awesome...not cute, or anything, but you won't want a tetanus shot from walking by with the door open...

And before I started cleaning, I totally did one of my Biggest Loser exercise videos...thank you Bob...and thank you extra for not being as annoying as Jillian...that woman drives me bananas...with all this goodness and getting upness, it was like I didn't even know myself....

Today Addy cut her hair.  Correction on her part, she was cutting out her pony.  When she walked past me I thought she must have just pulled some hair out when she took out the rubber band, but as I was grabbing the few stray whispies, it just kept coming out, like in gobs and gobs...I was totally freaking out.  It took all I had not to start crying.  Some pieces are pretty short, almost to the crown of her head, but those ones seem to have blended back in a bit.  We are going to see Heather first thing tomorrow.  It happened right before the other 2 got home from school, so when they got home she ran and hid underneath one of the dining room chairs.  I was cleaning in the other room and I could hear Colton saying "you're not ugly! And tomorrow Heather will cut your hair and it will be beautiful again!"  Then a little while later when I told her we needed to brush it, she started crying that she didn't want to be a boy, because boys don't have hair, and you have to have hair to be a girl...I'm pretty sure it'll end up being above her shoulders...and it was getting so long, and pretty to braid...she just kept yelling out how she didn't want her hair 'tut', she wanted it longer than Aubrey's...dead end dreams for her...

After school Colton called my mom to see if he could spend the night, and I could tell she must have been telling him all the things she had to do, and he replied "I'm cool with that"...and I just thought, who are you!  Stop being so, not little anymore...

BH&G Baby Book

Your Day...

Let's suppose now that you are one of those lucky women who don't suffer from nausea or any other complaint of pregnancy.  You want to stay that way, and provide a quiet environment, too, in which your baby's nerves can flourish as well as his body.  Here's the regimen that will do it:

Arise, brush your teeth, care for your breasts, take a short walk.

Eat breakfast, go to the toilet (that's a whole lotta gettin done before you piddle).  Relax, take your time.

Do your house work, keeping windows open and going out of doors for as much as possible.

Eat lunch.

Rest for two hours. Wear loose clothes and lie in a quiet room.  Sleep if possible, and try to arrange so there'll be no interruptions.

Spend the rest of the afternoon out of doors if you can.  Visit with friends, or if it's nice weather, sit in the yard or on the porch, sewing or reading.  A foot-powered sewing machine shouldn't be used in later months of pregnancy, but an electric machine is alright.

Prepare and eat dinner.  If tired, rest before washing the dishes.

Spend the evening reading or with friends, but retire by 10:30 p.m. or not later than 11:00 p.m.


Picture....

this was the mass of hair I collected...it was a completely traumatizing experience for me...

*After I got the kids off to school, I came home all geared up to go on walk.  Kent even got up to go with me.  The weather was awesome, Otis was ready, we had plenty of time...and about 5 minutes in my hip was hurting so bad we had to come back home...there I was just all chubby and gimpy, hobbling all the way home...I was so annoyed...so I had pizza for lunch and a huge piece of cake for dessert...suck on that exercise fairy...

*I'm bored...

*I love Project Runway, and I am ashamed to admit....America's Next Top Model...but man, Tyra drives me nuts...I would pay money to watch someone just run up and knock her stupid photos out of her hand...

*Addy's prayer tonight...."Heavenly Father, we love you and want to live with you again..thank you for my family, thank you for the world and that our hearts aren't breaking, that they are still beeping...and I draw a picture...in the name Jesus Christ amen!"  I loved every second of it...

*the rain and thunder and lighting tonight were crazy...only in the Tri-Cities can you have a downpour that has the gutters flooded almost up to the top of the sidewalk, and then an hour later, all the sidewalks are completely dry...

*I am so ready for it to start cooling off at night so I can open the windows for some fresh air...

*Mallary said the nicest things about me on her blog for my birthday...the best part about someone writing nice things instead of saying them, is you get to read it over and over, without coming across as vain when you ask "wait, what?  I didn't hear you..."

*Kent turned the cable back on.  I spent some time today watching Say Yes to the Dress: Bridesmaids and Toddlers and Tiaras...mind blown...

*tonight Colton and I finished our third Fablehaven book...I love reading with him...

*I have to, need to start reading with Aubs more.  She told me she's still reading at a 1st grade level.  I so don't want her to fall behind...I bought her an Amelia Bedelia chapter book today, and I think she might like the girl version of Diary of A Wimpy Kid that I saw at Costco today...

*Kent and I laughed together so much today...it was...I don't know, totally bitchin?  I love how much we talk about how we love and like each other so much more now than when we got married...we have come so far...and I say that with all the love in my heart...


Better Homes and Garden Baby Book Segment....

If You are a Working Woman....

If you have a job, you'll want to know what to do about quitting work.  Your condition will become rather readily apparent by the fifth month.  If you appearance is important in your work, you'll want to quit, or perhaps arrange to work from home after that.  Perhaps obvious pregnancy doesn't matter (employers are much less squeamish about this than they used to be), but your work keeps you on your feet or is otherwise physically tiring.  Then you should quit two months before your baby's birth and spend the time resting and getting things ready for him in leisurely fashion.  However, if yours is a "sitting" job and you enjoy it, follow your own wishes about keeping or discontinuing it.


Pictures...

Addy has been coloring a lot lately...while she was drawing this she asked "mom, did baby Addy have hair?" She seems to be leaving out the bodies, and just going to straight to the legs, but check out the background detail!  A sky, grass, a sun...and I think it might be a bird in the middle...I tried showing her how I make birds that look kin of like m's...she just kept asking where the beak was...

I went to market yesterday...I came home with some good stuff...

It was my birthday this week.  33 years old.  Bleh....

It fell on Labor Day this year, so the kids were home and Kent took the day off.  When I first got up Aubrey got me a bowl of cereal and a glass of lemonade, as a surprise of course.  Then Addy covered me with her blanket for another birthday surprise...sweet girls...

We took the kids to see Planes..it was ok, nothing to write home about....and by the time we got out of the theater it was too late to do anything else, so we came home and I asked everyone to clean the house for me for my birthday present.

Tuesday we actually got my cake and Kent surprised me with a new restaurant for dinner.  It was called Steppe something, a BBQ place.  He even invited my family and Danielle and Dennis!  The food was good, but I didn't really like any of the bbq sauces...but it's always fun to try new places and the seating was outside which was awesome for the kids...and then Kent sawed a bee in half with his plastic knife...and I couldn't eat too much after that...

I forgot to mention Alicia, Allison, Linda, and Eden took me out for lunch too...Amy and Lisa came, obviously, since we are package deal typically...I hadn't had Casa Mia in so long, and it was delicious.  The service however was total garb...I really have some awesome friends...

I had a million super nice birthday fb messages too...

After dinner we came back and had cake, my strawberry cake from Desserts by Kelly.  It has got to be one of my favorite traditions...

When I was getting ready to go to dinner Addison was riding around on her balance bike singing "Jesus, Jesus...Je Je Je Jesus....I miss you Jesus..." and all kinds of other stuff...I even heard Aubrey singing about how he has done so many things, but the best was creating the world!  Seriously, never a dull moment...

At family prayer that night Addison decided she could say it all by herself...she included something about a wind storm, and eating cereal, and some other funny stuff, and me, Colton, and Aubs tried our best not to laugh.  After the prayer Kent sent Addy to bed, who went happily because in the morning it was preschool, and talked to the kids about not laughing at Addy.  He didn't say my name specifically, but it totally applied to me, and it was just kinda funny because he was on one side, and then it was the three of us, all sitting in a row, all needing the same reminder about reverence...Colton said he was trying so hard, but the cereal part just killed him...

Aubrey has been having some problems with a girl on the bus...whenever I try to understand her story, from finish to start, she always ends up getting super frustrated, and I don't feel like I can get a real read on how she's feeling about all of it...like yesterday she said the girl slapped her on the leg, but when I asked her what she was doing, she said 'just plugging my ears going blah blah blah'...today the girl called her a brat...and I know it's not nice, but it's not like Aubs is coming home crying, or seeming super upset...it's more like she's reporting the events of the day...I should probably just go talk to the bus driver...or teach Aubs how to bring a kid to tears with just a few simple words...I mean, she bites her nails to nubbins, so scratching her eyes out isn't an option...ugh, why is life so hard...

today Addy told me she likes to lay with me because I'm beautiful...is it any wonder she's my favorite?

When her and I went over to my moms today, my dad said 'hi Addy' and she ignored him, walked right past him and said 'hi dwamma'  She's such a peach...

I actually exercised yesterday.  I went on a walk, and I even jogged a few times...it probably totaled like a whole minute running time...and this stupid mom pushing her jogger stoller, jogged right past me...and she was skinny, and she just kept on jogging...I hate people like that.  It's not natural...anyway, today every time I stood up and started walking I thought my arse was on fire...it's stupid how out of shape I am...

Pictures.....

Finally, Addy's first day of preschool...she might have had a mental breakdown had this day not finally come..

She was so stoked to have her picture taken...I took 36 pictures total, and she was smiling in 2 of them.  I finally did the whole 'don't you smile' thing...

I didn't get one in front of the chalk board, so I used picmonkey instead...

I had her cute little sandals all ready to go...and Kent had to give her some new Jordans...she wanted to wear her sparkly snake skins...not the cutest things together, but whatever works I guess...

And Marcy snapped this at school...our two bestie's...her and Conley, bosom buddies...

 

 

I had to teach in Relief Society today.  My lesson didn't go quite how I thought it would, and sometimes I think the hardest part is never having the chance to go back the next day, and say "I forgot this really cool thing!" or "I'm not sure if I really got my point across, this lesson was truly meant to be uplifting"....just little things...corrections, or do overs...what's done is done, and today that was just more than I could handle for some reason.  So I came home and cried.  Not the sobbing kind, the silent hot tears kind, that keep coming back even when you think you've finished....I think the expression "are you ok?" is like the Pavlov bell ringing for tears...

The worst part is, my whole lesson was meant to be on finding happiness and strength and a love for yourself based on knowing your limitless potential because we are literal spirit children of our Heavenly Parents.  I hoped the women would leave feeling better about themselves, and I left feeling like such a failure.  I couldn't help feeling hypocritical...everything seemed to compound, and so I just laid there with Kent, playing phase 10 on my phone, willing myself to stop thinking about it....

On a much brighter note, now that I have concluded my Sin City Reports, I can once again, write about the craziness that is my kids....aka, all the ridiculousness that comes out of Addy's mouth, and a bit about the other two...I mean, I love them all, but somehow Addy seems to be a bit of a show stealer...

Last week, I was taking turns laying with each of the kids at bed time, and Addy was mad about something, so while I was laying with her, she was being a total pill.  After a few minutes I finally told her if she didn't start being nice I was going to get up and lay with someone else...and instead of changing her actions, or asking me to stay, she told me I couldn't have anymore of her blanket...so, with that I said, 'ok.  I'm getting up'...and as I stood, she said "Fine.  I'm tired of you anyway.  I'm not gonna listen to anything you say."  I'm pretty sure her sugar and spice were swapped out with something a lot less sweet...because the next day when I said her and Conley couldn't paint, she sat right next to me and said 'I hate you'...apparently words aren't holding much weight with her, because after she sat in time out, and I asked her to apologize for what she said, she replied 'um, I forgot, what I said again?'

This afternoon the kids were playing, and I was still laying in my bed, which meant it was probably more evening that afternoon, Aubrey came in crying.  I have been trying to be more aware of my kids feelings, and taking the time to give comfort when needed, give them validation in hopes of diminishing some of their frustration...she came and laid down, and I wrapped my arms around her, and asked what happened...Addy had pulled her bun out, to which I had to stifle a laugh when I checked out her hair, and Colton was only being nice to Addy and not her.  My very first thought was, 'she should really talk to Amy'..it was super middle child, and it made me so sad.  It's just been recently that I think she is really noticing the difference in the way Colton talks and treats both of them.  Colton and Aubs fight almost constantly, and it feels like their soul purpose in life is to bug each other. I talked to her a little bit, and we just laid there together cuddling...and though I am sad she was feeling so down, I was grateful for the opportunity to just sit with her for awhile...

I am so exhausted....

Tonight we spent some time with Kent's family.  His extended Sanders family.  After my mini breakdown, I wasn't feeling up to going, so we kept putting it off, and I almost didn't go.  But at the last minute I knew I should pull up my big girl  shorts and just do it.  And I'm glad I did.  I had such a nice time visiting with everyone.  And when Colton said 'we were supposed to be leaving like an hour ago', it was a flashback to my childhood...he might as well have called me Karen....on the drive home, I told Kent I was glad I went and he told me he was glad I went too, that if I wouldn't have gone he would have been there without his other half...and that statement in and of itself, made going all the more worth it...

Also on the ride home was fighting about arm rests, and Addy telling me she is going to get me golden shoes for my birthday.  She also said she knew what I wanted for Christmas, and that was for her to stop using 'yutty wuds'-yucky words.  I told her I would love that for Christmas, then she asked if I know why she uses yutty wuds...she had two reasons, but right now in my fatigued state of mind I can only remember one, and that was because I always keep telling her it's not a stool(school) day yet...

Pictures....

First day of school...she's already had a girl be rude to her on the bus...mean kids are the worst...so is a house with craptastic lighting...the flash on the chalk board is driving me nuts...and so is the color difference on the pics...but I think she's pretty freakin cute!

Colton was killing me when I wanted to take his picture.  His dad has taught him well when it comes to the love and affection one must have with his Jordans...when I told Colton I wanted to take his picture outside too, his reply was "Not on the grass!"  Holy wow.  What would it be like to be a nine year old boy that won't put his shoes in the grass...

Vegas or Bust: Part Three...

So we are headed to the Wynn, this crazy nice, expensive hotel.  We had an awesome view of it's sheer ginormousness from Jim and Jodi's window in their room.  The front of this hotel is covered in huge waterfalls and fountains...and the whole building looks like it's made out of copper.  And the reader board?  Insane!  It's huge and it's continually changing...

So we walk in the front doors, and it's like you can literally smell the money.  Right as we walk in, off to the left is a restaurant and part of the wall is this huge clock collage, and it looks like the biggest clock is some sort of cutout in the wall...and then it occurs to me, this is literally the only clock I have seen besides the alarm clock in our room.  No joke, there are literally no clocks anywhere....because Vegas hotels and casinos are giant time suckers... there are no windows once you really get inside either...no evidence of life outside...Walking through this foyer?  Entry hall?  Wing?, what ever you would call it, the floors are gorgeous, and even the bathroom stalls are made out of marble with big, heavy, wooden doors...and if I'm not mistaken, all the sinks and faucets were gold...but that could have been a different hotel, because remember, everything at this point is kind of blurring together.  Because our trip was like a cram session for a final exam...we had such a limited amount of time, and awesome friends who were going to show us the very most we could see...

Back on point, the hall, for lack of a better word opens up to this massive room, I guess you would call it? and there are these big sections of tree lanes...like two rows of trees that arch together over head and they are all wrapped with lights and have things hanging from them, and it's kinda magical to walk under them hand in hand with Kent...next we walk over to look out this gigantic window and there is this beautiful water feature outside. We all kind of stood there and took it all in....and it's all just so surreal...and big...I seriously need to get a thesaurus and time in the word large...I bet I could use every suggestion they give me...

Then we head over to the Ferrari Show Room...and what do you know, they want $10 a person  just to look at the cars.  Just to look.  We opted out, and decided to see if we could find a deal on some tickets to Le Rev....as we pass the concierge desk Kent tells Zane to go flirt with the girl behind the counter and get us some tickets...and then Zane says...'how much do you think she weighs?' It was a joke, a perfectly timed, perfectly delivered hilarious joke...and I think I almost died.  Maybe you had to be there, but oh my gosh, Kent and I kept laughing...we find out the tickets start at $105 and decide to wait...because times 2, that's a lot of money...which was fine for Zane, because at this point he was $300 under budget...I almost forgot, we ended up at a dead end with a roped off staircase, and on the landings going down, they had all these EA Sports logos on the floor...Kent thought it was pretty cool..

We walked around the hotel some more, and they by far had the nicest looking casino...I can't remember which hotel we were in when we passed a black jack table that had a minimum buy in of $300...can you even imagine?!  As we were walking we came across a showcase with the Olympics Basketball players shoes and gold medal...interesting enough, it was the shoes and uniforms of Kobe, Durrant, and LeBron, and the mannequins were white...and not to make a racial slur or anything, but there are a lot of Asians up in Las Vegas...maybe that's why they advertise them naked...and tons of people speaking other languages...

Anyway, after that we were on to our next stop, the Palazzo...and it was huge, and I'm not quite sure to be honest when it stopped being the Palazzo and started being the Venetian...all of these hotels are filled with all of these designers stores and tons of shops, and there was never anyone in any of them...the Venetian might have been my favorite place yet...it was like my homeland was calling to me, and I got it in my head I needed to try and find a cannoli...we walked past the gondoliers and their striped shirts and singing, and rounded the corner, and I literally shrieked at the bakery sign...I'm pretty sure I could see some heads whipping around to see who just died out of the corner of my eye.  It was super cute on the outside, and sure enough, fresh freakin cannoli's...Kent picked out a chocolate croissant...and literally half a second after we were out of the store I had half of that thing gone.  It was fabulous.  I think I took about 3 bites before it even occurred to me to ask Kent if he wanted a bite.  I attacked that thing.  I want them served at my funeral.  Next we stopped at this super cool candy store and bought the kids a $20 box of oversized candy.  Because everything is bigger in Vegas...and it was kinda rad...

We head outside and there is a moving sidewalk...hallelujah!  I don't have to take steps for at least 20 seconds...and then I almost fall stepping off of it...I have the coordination of a toddler...we decide to stop back by our hotel and drop off Tramp before heading to the Paris to meet Cortland and Emily for dinner, and I sent Kent upstairs by himself while I sat at a slot machine basking in the joy of resting my aching legs...I know the night is young and we still have an enormous amount of ground to cover.  Here's a fun little side note, Jim and Jodi are straight up animals.  Not once did I hear them complain about walking or their feet, or their legs, or being tired...I'm almost convinced they are part robot...

Back at the Paris we have some time to kill before dinner, and me, Kent and Zane think we've hit the motherload when we find this quiet, secluded, bar area to sit in.  All 3 of us just sat there on our phones.  Not walking.  Doing normal stuff like checking facebook...back in the real world, where people have clothes on and you can't smoke indoors...and then it starts to wreak like smoke.  And I swear they must have a smoke machine to drive out non drinkers, because I seriously thought we were the only ones in there...

Time for dinner at the Burger Brassier...that's right, the Burger Bra.  And the waitresses dress accordingly.  Big boobs-check  Bra-check Corset-check Mini Shorts-check...and not to be mean, but I think our waitress was just on the other side of 'young enough' to be waiting on people in her underwear.  Since we had burgers at lunch I decided to wait and grab a slice of pizza around the corner...this is the first time we've really had a chance to talk with Emily and Cortland, and it was super fun.  Emily is so nice, and she just looks like she could fit in my pocket.  She is tiny, and pretty, and nice...and I don't even hate her for it! What is Vegas doing to me?

We finish up dinner, and head out to find me a piece of pizza...when we found the place and stopped, Kent and I stood there and watched everyone keep walking, waiting to see how far they would go before they realized we weren't there...then Kent text Jim and asked why they left us...we walk up to them as I'm shoving a bite of pizza in my mouth, and Jim just starts laughing at me.  And I realize in the last like 12 hours he has watched me devour cheesecake,  a cannoli, and now a big piece of pizza, all while out walking around...and I understand why he's laughing...

Now it's dark and time to head to the Bellagio to see the fountains.  The first time we watched it was from the sky bridge, and the only music you could hear was from the penny beggar guitar guy behind us.  And he was so loud.  Kent said he was gonna offer him some money to NOT play while we stood there...but even being kinda far away, the amazingness wasn't totally lost...but wow that guy was so annoying...finally, we are there, after another 12 escalator rides and the anticipation is super fun...we can start to see the fountains coming up, and we're taking pictures, and Cortland is trying to get some guy that doesn't speak English to take a big group shot, and then it starts....and it's like one of the coolest things I've ever seen.  The sound the water makes when it's shooting up so crazy high is awesome...we stay to watch the next one, but it's opera and that kinda lames it down a bit...but still super cool...but later on when we were leaving we watched it Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds...

We grab some ice cream cones and start a million mile excursion looking for this huge chocolate fountain inside the hotel. And it takes forever.  We finally find it, and it's big, and kinda weird, and there's beautiful cakes and a life size ball gown made out of chocolate...

After that we head towards the actual rooms of the hotel to see what a cool place Cortland and Emily are staying in..he had to show an attendant at the elevators his room key just to walk down the elevator hallway.  We didn't even have to show our key to get into the pool at Harrah's.  Yeah.  We get up to like the millionth floor, and their room is awesome.  And the view is awesome.  And there bathroom was super nice.  Our bathroom had two baby lights that took 20 minutes just to warm up to barely more than dim...and I can't help but be jealous that they are already back at their hotel and we are no where close to ours...and I forgot my bionic legs at home...maybe Jim and Jodi have a spare....

Here's the nutty part.  We are tired, and our legs hurt, but it's barely 10:00-10:30, and that's like mid afternoon in Vegas time, and it's our last night there.  And our room is lame.  So we decide to hoof it back to the Mirage, catch the Tram and go watch the Treasure Island Pirate ship thing...everyone else bailed but me and Kent and Zane.

We hang out in Senor Frogs for a bit, which was touch and go for a second...I didn't have my ID with me, because I had taken my wallet out of my purse to make it as light as possible.  When the guy at the door asked what the problem was, I said I forgot my ID, he looked at me, shrugged, and stamped my arm.  Boom.  Vegas Style.

Finally, it's time to take our places by the ropes, and we wait and wait, and people start lining up everywhere.  And the kids, I can't forget the kids up at midnight for the pirate show.  Better known as the Skanky Pirates of the Sea...it was not what I was expecting.  At all.  All of a sudden this super cool ship is covered in slut pirates singing and by singing, I mean lip singing, the worst songs ever...but have no fear, the second pirate ship sailed up and it was covered in men with their shirts open...I'm not gonna lie, the special effects were super cool, and the flips and jumps, and the cannons, but the story line and grinding, and never ending crotch gyrating, was a bit much.  The story goes, the slut pirates have a boy pirate, and they won't give him back, and he doesn't want to go back, so the boy pirates shoot cannons and blow up her closets, the head sea wench...and this part really was cool, because the fire coming out of the closets was so massive, that it literally burned your face.  And how did  the Siren Sea Wench reply?  I think Zane said it best when he asked "are they gonna dance them to death?"  Yet, another music and dance number full of arse shaking and boobie bouncing.  In the end, they all ended up on the ship together, which is an important part, lest we miss the part where there was some dry humping on the netted rope....and they all lived happily ever after...

We headed back to our hotel and the three of us hung out downstairs, where we didn't see the cage dancers, maybe it's just bad form to dance up there on a Sunday...we stayed and talked and shared our regrets of being in Vegas and not making it to a real show...and then the smoke was just too much...

Back in our room, Kent and I laid around talking and analyzing the weekend, and it was so fun...definitely a highlight of the trip...I love him with my whole heart...we packed up our stuff, laid down and set our alarm to go off in about 3 hours...super gag...

3:40 came fast...and besides eating some breakfast from Auntie Ann's in the Vegas airport, I can't tell you much more...because I literally slept every time I sat still for more than 2 seconds...

And then we were home....

Here is my last and final observation about Las Vegas- "The Strip"....as we were riding an escalator, and looking around, I realized I couldn't see anything natural.  Everything was man made.  Besides the palm trees outside, which weren't even in a natural setting, the whole city is stuff, made to look like real stuff...it left me wanting for some nature, some connection to the real world...I had a lot of fun, and saw some amazing things, and met some awesome people, and in the end it was spending time with Kent, and our friends, that made the weekend memorable.  It was a place unlike anything I have ever experienced, and it wouldn't have been the same without everyone and their kindness and generosity.  And for that, I know Kent and I are truly thankful.

Pictures...

This is outside the Wynn Hotel...*disclaimer-regardless of what all my striped dress pictures look like, I am not pregnant*

I swear it was windy!

A set of stairs inside the Wynn...crazy gamers...

The Olympic Basketball showcase...notice the white mannequins...it's a valid observation...

me and my cannoli...

the coolest phone case ever...it was at the candy store, and it's my one regret, that I didn't buy it...

waiting for the fountains...remember the disclaimer....

The ceiling at Senor Frogs was covered in these...

Getting to the airport...

Descending to land back in Pasco...

crop circles look so rad from an airplane perspective...

And this is to show the giantness of the box of candy...