Tonight the cousins convened to plan out Danielle's baby shower...and while the planning and assigning and decision making was by far the most important part...the best part was comparing a few hygienic habits. There were 7 of us total. Survey says, 3 of us admitted to not washing our hands every time we pee...and 6 out of the 7 admitted to peeing in the shower. I can't even tell you how hysterical and anxiety ridden the non-peeing-in-the-shower person was about the news. I think this might just be scientific proof, that those who can really relax in the shower, are more relaxed as a whole...I urge this person to just let loose, just one time...and feel free to bleach right after...either way, I think some aqua socks might just be the perfect gift for her...by the time we were done talking about our bathroom habits, germs, and floating fecal matter, I was left with the over whelming urge to lick my unwashed hand and rub it across Kimmie's face...I managed to refrain...lucky for her...and probably me too...So the question remains...do you pee in the shower? do you seriously wash your hands every time you piddle? will you answer these questions honestly if asked?
Aubrey and Addy are still awake. I want to kill myself. It's like 12:30am.
Pictures...
So, on my birthday Lisa and I headed over to TJ Maxx for a quick trip around the isles. My $20 bucks was burning a hole in my pocket....we came across this beauty...I mean who wouldn't want an urn full of stacked and glued seashells as high as the eye can see?
And for the bargain price of $149.00....
I also received this little birthday greeting via text, with a sweet lil' message that said "Humpy Birthday" My only hand made card...
12 comments:
You, my friend, are out of control. Apparently you don't take to breaking people in slowly. Nothing like being right back at blogging no holds barred. Thanks for making me laugh so much I started coughing, then gagging, then coughing some more.
Can't wait to see what comments come in on this post.
1--who was the humpy pic from??
2--I'm gonna go ahead and ignore the fact that you did end up going to TJ Max on your birthday and didn't call me like you said you would if you went.
3--I have no shame whatsoever in admitting I pee in the shower. Come on, the warm water hits your cold naked skin, what's gonna happen? You're gonna have to pee. Besides, it's good for the environment. Saves on TP. I am, however, slightly ashamed to admit I don't wash my hands every time I pee. Because, frankly, it's pretty disgusting when you think about all the germ-infested things you've just touched.
4--I can honestly say I don't have floating fecal matter.
1. Peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches....POOOF! You've all just turned your shower/tub into a GIANT URINAL!!!
2. I'm never showering at any of your houses unless your hospitality includes a complimentary pair of Old Navy flip flops. Grey or black please.
3. If I so much as have to touch the door handle, flusher handle, or even faucet handle – I wash my hands. I don't even like to use the towels in there unless it's my own or it's a paper towel.
4. Wash your hands you gross-o's. It's no wonder I end up vomiting the next day after any cousin gathering. You all just spread your feces from you know where to the guitar hero peripherals, to the pizza, to the cupcakes, to the soda bottle, to my mouth. YUK.
5. I wish my immune system was as strong as all of yours. Apparently, it's not genetic, it's acquired, However, if that's what it takes, I'll pass on the poo!
Now everyone knows why I avoid visiting extended family members' homes. My suspicions have been confirmed. If you wish to take a walk down Ethiopia Lane, you can go visit any of Danielle's cousins houses. You will experience all of the challenges of a poverty stricken child in the middle east, along with disease door prizes you can take home! sorry, you can't turn these down. You automatically acquire these wonderful prizes as soon as you walk through the door and breathe. I stand by those who refuse to relieve themselves in a bathtub and enjoy the comforts of a toilet. Many people have died for the cause of inventing the toilet, I do it in honor of them. We should pull up stats comparing Bathtub relievers vs success in life.
Dennis, how do you ever leave the basement with another non-hand-washing person living in the same house?
Dennis,
Extended family? What about your wife? You do realize that she is one of the original 6 offenders, right? Or do you two have separate showering facilities?
Amy, I have to shower and scrub constantly to survive. I tell Danielle I'm wearing a mask because I'm "working on the car".
Josh, we no longer use the same shower.
@Dennis
Good good. I figured such, but i had to be sure. You never can be too careful.
So, do you force Kaitlin and Danielle to use the same shower or do you have to use the only clean one in the house and migrate to the parental's shower?
I shower when your parents leave. Shhhhh.....Sometimes I use the irrigation canal, but that's because I'm trying to slowly build up my immune system. I figure whatever is in the irrigation canal is nothing compared to what my baby immune system is up against in the house.
Jason just told me that he feels justified in not washing his hands since he doesn't touch anything, his hands stay on his hips, or behind his head.
Oh my gosh this is hilarious! Firstly, I don't recall anyone saying the peed in the bathtub!! E to the wwww. (ewwww) peeing in the shower where it goes straight down the drain and disappears and you immediately wash your entire body afterward is quite a different thing from peeing in a bathtub full of water that you are now going to be soaking in. Come on people! Details, details.
And I have to defend your (Josh) and Danielle's cousins and your Ethiopian accusation. I'll have you know that I find them very clean, always. Their houses, themselves...now, me, on the other hand, could be a little more questionable. Something is growing in my sink that smells like vomit and sometimes I don't shower until 4 pm. So feel free to condemn me and wear gas masks if you're in the general vicinity of my home (which, if you're at Rach's, you are) but give those gals a break! As far as having clean, cute, orderly houses and clean, cute, well-dressed bodies go, I wanna be them when I grow up. So there. Oh, but Josh, thank you. I really will take hand washing more seriously now.
WV: gismk. Pretty sure that's the name of the "disease" you'll catch from Rach's "germ-infested" doorknobs. Yes, that's me, making fun of Josh and Dennis, in case that wasn't clear.
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